What does Abundance look like?

A couple of days ago I completed the Deepak Chopra 21-day Meditation Challenge. Every day I followed the guided meditation exploring the meaning, source and manifestation of abundance. I had an idea of what abundance would look and feel like, and I had expectations on the results of the challenge. Nonetheless, through the process, I was reminded, over and over again, to let go of all those "shoulda, woulda, coulda". I have started to learn to let Spirit surprise me. I would still hold on to images of success, happiness, love and prosperity, but never forgetting what I've found to be truthful, time and time again:

Ephesians 3:20

Now to Him Who, by (in consequence of) the [action of His] power that is at work within us, is able to [carry out His purpose and] do superabundantly, far over and above all that we [dare] ask or think [infinitely beyond our highest prayers, desires, thoughts, hopes, or dreams]

Meditation has allowed me to consider that just as I am the source of my thoughts, I am also the source of my experiences. I went deep inside to uncover the beliefs, thoughts, words, actions and omissions that brought about the same things I have dreaded and tried so hard to avoid. There, in the Stillness, there is no one else to blame, no room for BS, no one to pity or treat as victim. It becomes ever so clear that, like Moses, you are holding the Rod, the authority to bring forth the miraculous, so what are you crying out for? Exodus 14:15-16

I was marveled to discover the ways in which I had so masterfully created misery, scarcity and limitation, loneliness and struggle. But far from feeling guilt, or shame, or angst, I was allowed to uncover that same power of creation capable of bringing forth the manifestation of happiness, prosperity, abundance, love and success. It was like God had broken down the process of Creation for me, and revealed both its surprising simplicity and its depth. I also went behind the scenes to learn some more about the ways of the Soul vs the ways of the Ego, and it brought immense satisfaction to know I was just scratching the surface. I would end my mediation time bursting in Christian-style worship and recalling Bible verses like I was this really cool "web search engine".

Romans 11:33

Amplified Bible (AMP)

33 Oh, the depth of the riches and wisdom and knowledge of God! How unfathomable (inscrutable, unsearchable) are His judgments (His decisions)! And how untraceable (mysterious, undiscoverable) are His ways (His methods, His paths)!

So what does abundance looks like, after taking the Meditation Challenge? First and foremost, a yearned and cherished Spiritual Freedom: the knowledge and conviction that sets you free from dogma; also, an increasing awareness of Oneness with the Creator and with all of creation, therefore, with the source of unlimited potentiality; ultimately, a sense of stability and inner peace that I never thought possible.

There is a shift in my mental atmosphere, that inevitably started to manifest in my physical reality. Just before completing the Challenge: estranged relatives came back seeking emotional connection, offering help and support; a long lost romantic interest returned to find out if I was now available, sweeping me off my feet with passionate interest, generosity and commitment. Since I am now falling in love with this fine gentleman, for the first time in thirteen years, I have fallen back in love with myself, have no need to overeat, and feel like working out, enjoy the outdoors and dance every single day! Every day I enjoy to hear the carefree laugh of my kids around me, reflecting my own, new found, inner sense of trust and reliance upon God and the wonderful process of Life.

Meditation Resources

7 SPIRITUAL LAWS OF SUCCESS The 7 Spiritual Laws of Success are the laws of nature applied to our everyday life. Each of the daily meditation sessions will end with a review of the spiritual law of success for that day. Application of these laws will enable us to live a more enlightened existence. Sunday- The Law of Pure Potentiality “Om Bhavam Namah” “I am absolute existence” - Cultivate stillness - Commune with nature - Practice non-judgement

Monday- The Law of Giving & Receiving

“Om Vardhanam Namah” “ I nourish the universe and the
universe nourishes me”

- Practice breath awareness
- Cultivate a sense of gratitude
- Acknowledge your needs

Tuesday- The Law of Karma (or cause & effect)

“Om Kriyam Namah” “ My actions are aligned with cosmic
law”

- Witness your choices
- Consider the consequences
- Listen to your heart

Wednesday- The Law of Least Effort

“Om Daksham Namah” “My actions achieve maximal benefit
with minimal effort”

- Practice acceptance
- Accept responsibility
- Be defenseless

Thursday- The Law of Intentions & Desires

“Om Ritam Namah” “ My intentions and desires are
supported by cosmic intelligence”

- Be clear of your intentions & desires
- Trust in the outcome
- Practice present moment awareness

Friday- The Law of Detachment

“Om Anandham Namah” “My actions are blissfully free
from attachment to outcome”

- Practice detachment
- Embrace uncertainty
- Surrender to the field of pure potentiality

Saturday- The Law of Dharma (or purpose in life)

“Om Varunam Namah” “My life is in harmony with
cosmic law”

- Attend to your silent witness
- Acknowledge your talents
- Help & serve other.

The Resurrection of Dreams

1 Chronicles 4:9-10

Amplified Bible (AMP)

9 Jabez was honorable above his brothers; but his mother named him Jabez [sorrow maker], saying, Because I bore him in pain.

10 Jabez cried to the God of Israel, saying, Oh, that You would bless me and enlarge my border, and that Your hand might be with me, and You would keep me from evil so it might not hurt me! And God granted his request.

There comes a time when releasing your past and its conditioning is essential to reconnect with your true potential. In the Silence, you feel a joy that has no external source: nothing has changed in the outside, and somehow, within you, everything is different.  You discover that regardless of external evens and situations, that joy of Spirit is always accessible, unconditionally available at the conscious shift of your attention.  To come to this realization is to uncover the source of all goodness, potentiality and possibilities. You stop waiting for something to change on the outside: for people to be more agreeable, for circumstances to be more favorable, for the weather to be more propitious. You know the state of things has nothing to do with your state of being. Such a discovery is exhilarating and life changing.  

Remember the dreams you had as a child? Back then, your imagination was a reliable source of information about the World and about possibilities.  You drafted your dreams with crayons and enacted them vividly day after day.  There was no doubt your future would turn out to be exactly as you envisioned it. Then, what happened?  Adults, who must have known better, where there to define reality for you. They became a source of facts and information that had to be more reliable than that naive, inexperienced, little internal voice.  Well, it didn't stop there, they did not just define reality for you, they defined You. They gave you a name, nicknames, surnames, based on their perception of you and their perception of themselves. The rest is history: you stopped enacting your dreams to act out on their definition of yourself.  

Little did they know that the Source of your childhood dreams, the Source of your true identity, continues to call you by your Name.  

Isaiah 45:3

And I will give you the treasures of darkness and hidden riches of secret places, that you may know that it is I, the Lord, the God of Israel, Who calls you by your name.

Isaiah 45:4

For the sake of Jacob My servant, and of Israel My chosen, I have called you by your name. I have surnamed you, though you have not known Me.

In the Silence and Stillness, the voice of your Maker, whispers your original name and reminds you that your childhood dreams where nothing but God's original vision for your existence. You experience a rebirth, as you discover that your potential is as unlimited as your Source, and that all the news forecasts of this World and all the naysayers in your life have no power to alter that reality. You learn to turn within whenever you feel the need for a "reality check".  As dreams are resurrected, life turns back to be extraordinary, miraculous, exciting and magical again.

Isaiah 9:6

For to us a Child is born, to us a Son is given; and the government shall be upon His shoulder, and His name shall be called Wonderful...

Reading the Mystics

Let nothing upset you;

Let nothing frighten you.

Everything is changing;

God alone is changeless.

Patience attains the goal.

Who has God lacks nothing;

God alone fills all our needs.

~Saint Teresa of Avila

For me, prayer is an upward leap of the heart, an untroubled glance towards heaven, a cry of gratitude and love which I utter from the depths of sorrow as well as from the heights of joy. It has a supernatural grandeur which expands the soul and unites it with God. I say an Our Father or a Hail Mary when I feel so spiritually barren that I cannot summon up a single worth while thought. These two prayers fill me with rapture and feed and satisfy my soul. 

~St. Thérèse of Lisieux,The Story of a Soul.

I drove away from my mind everything capable of spoiling the sense of the presence of God.... I just make it my business to persevere in His holy presence... My soul has had an habitual, silent, secret conversation with God.

~Brother Lawrence (1614-1691)

An humble knowledge of thyself is a surer way to God than a deep search after learning. 

~Thomas Kempis

“Silence is the language of God, 

all else is poor translation.” 

~Rumi (Islam)

Just as a mirror, which reflects all things, is set in its own container, so too the rational soul is placed in the fragile container of the body. In this way, the body is governed in its earthly life by the soul, and the soul contemplates heavenly things through faith.

~HILDEGARD OF BINDEN, letter to the Monk Guibert, 1175

 

“At times God puts us through the discipline of darkness to teach us to heed Him. Song birds are taught to sing in the dark, and we are put into the shadow of God's hand until we learn to hear Him...Watch where God puts you into darkness, and when you are there keep your mouth shut. Are you in the dark just now in your circumstances, or in your life with God? Then remain quiet...When you are in the dark, listen, and God will give you a very precious message for someone else when you get into the light.” 

~Oswald Chambers (Protestant)

Do not try to become anything.
Do not make yourself into anything.
Do not be a meditator.
Do not become enlightened.
When you sit, let it be.
What you walk, let it be.
Grasp at nothing.
Resist nothing.

If you haven't wept deeply, you haven't begun to meditate.

~Ajhan Chah

Me, Myself and Brenda...

It took me four years to make peace with my reality. I was resentful, bitter and angry.   I constantly compared my life's circumstances with others'.  I did not have a marriage, a successful career or professional title, a comfortable home, a savings fund, an ideal body image, a hometown to welcome me back, an unconditionally loving mother, a supportive father, an accepting sister, a welcoming church community.  I had nothing that would materially define my identity.  I held on to motherhood as my last stronghold, to finally accept that my children were increasingly more independent and self-reliant.   I was left alone, isolated and broken with nothing else than an unforgiving mirror reflecting back a wounded self-image; a scattered, confused mind and an ego-guarded, defensive heart.  

I tried desperately for years to buy the acceptance of others, by adopting their religious beliefs and world views. I sought to belong at the ever high cost of self betrayal.  Over and over again, I forced myself to fit into various social molds.  I camouflaged my feelings, thoughts and intentions to be more likable, and avoid rejection. I was not being hypocritical, I honestly forced myself to adapt, willingly mutilating myself psychologically and spiritually.  I fell for a false notion of salvation, offered by well-intention-ed church goers. "We welcome you", they said, "just as you are".  "We will patiently wait for you to conform to the only truth we are willing to accept...come worship our image of an All-American mainstream Jesus."  "Seek and ye shall find the holy grail of traditional marriage and the white picket fence heaven; repent of your morally inferior, non-white worldviews. The kingdom of heaven is likened to the America's of the 1950's, any ideals that deviate from that are terribly ungodly."

My desire to conform, stemmed from a deeply seated sense of unworthiness and inadequacy.  It was madness, and I have had to forgive myself. In my isolation, I had no other choice but to go within. There was Yeshua Ben David, the master, waiting in the Silence. I fell prostrated, blinded by the light of his countenance, so pure and unpretentious.  There too was Madre Maria, the divine feminine reminding me my feminine nature is also more than worthy.  Because of the genuineness of my spiritual search I can confidently believe there is absolutely nothing wrong with the way others experience the Divine. I can worship God in "Spirit and in Truth" and still honor the beliefs of all God's children, however different they might seem.  

Nonetheless, through my search I have gained the discernment to differentiate what it is just a different perspective of Universal Truth, from mere social constructs with political agendas. I firmly believe this is a time in the history of humanity when the hearts of many, mine included, will be exposed. Those false images, idols and social structures we have erected will no longer be there to hide the truth about ourselves.  Just like Adam and Eve, we will discover our nakedness and try to run to hide ourselves from our Creator, once again, but to no avail. We better make peace with the core of who we are, and who we were created to be. We need to start to reconcile within ourselves all the diverse, infinite aspects of the I AM, Creator of the Universe. We need to stop creating gods after our limited, exclusive image and likeness. It is no coincidence that women's issues are at the center of the political debate.  I recall it was about Mary that was prophesied:

Luke 2:35
And a sword will pierce through your own soul also—that the secret thoughts and purposes of many hearts may be brought out and disclosed.

On Stillness, Rest and Silence...

Psalm 46:10

Let be and be still, and know (recognize and understand) that I am God.

Mark 4:39

And He arose and rebuked the wind and said to the sea, Hush now! Be still (muzzled)! And the wind ceased ( sank to rest as if exhausted by its beating) and there was [immediately] a great calm (a perfect peacefulness).

Hebrews 4:9-10    

9 So then, there is still awaiting a full and complete Sabbath-rest reserved for the [true] people of God;

10 For he who has once entered [God’s] rest also has ceased from [the weariness and pain] of human labors, just as God rested from those labors [a]peculiarly His own.

Psalm 62:1 

A Psalm of David. For God alone my soul waits in silence; from Him comes my salvation.

Psalm 65:1

To You belongs silence (the submissive wonder of reverence which bursts forth into praise) and praise is due and fitting to You, O God, in Zion; and to You shall the vow be performed.

Habakkuk 2:20

But the Lord is in His holy temple; let all the earth hush and keep silence before Him.

And after the earthquake a fire, but the Lord was not in the fire; and after the fire [a sound of gentle stillness and] a still, small 

voice.

Isaiah 30:15

For thus said the Lord God, the Holy One of Israel: In returning [to Me] and resting [in Me] you shall be saved; in quietness and in [trusting] confidence shall be your strength.

Just a Touch of Grace

Romans 8:26
So too the [Holy] Spirit comes to our aid and bears us up in our weakness; for we do not know what prayer to offer nor how to offer it worthily as we ought, but the Spirit Himself goes to meet our supplication and pleads in our behalf with unspeakable yearnings and groanings too deep for utterance.

We all experience to some degree and at some level, the density of the material life.  I have a budget to balance in this challenging economy. The weight of financial demands feels unbearably heavy on my shoulders, as I go over my bills and expenses in my head endlessly. It wears me down, it holds a grip on me. Shame and guilt seem to hover over me like dark clouds as I question incisively what it is that I need to learn in order to experience the Unlimited as my reality here and now. I tell myself how I think it is suppose to be, how faith is suppose to work. I recall how easy it seemed a couple of weeks ago, when I felt as if I was soaring on the wings of Spirit over the appearances and circumstances of my life.  What has changed? I have been practicing my meditation daily, I have repeated my affirmations faithfully.  

We have been trained for centuries to rely on our senses for proof of what we can consider to be real. What is verifiable through our physical senses is the truth we can readily accept.  The Scientific Method is still the approach of our Super-conscious, even when, as people of faith, we say we believe in the unseen and in the existence of a metaphysical (beyond the physical) reality. To hold on to beliefs that challenge what our senses are perceiving seems not just supernatural, but unnatural.  Then we think that using the same discipline, consistency and effort will produce the observable results we look for, and that is what has become our so-called "spiritual practice". We just assume we must try harder, and that the absence of observable, predictable results means nothing but failure.

It still amazes me how Spirit pleads on our behalf when me most need it.  While battling the frustration of not being able to find inner silence, struggling to keep my mind still, I heard once again the subtle whisper : "Be gentle, kind and compassionate with yourself".  I am prompted to let go, to surrender, to just STOP trying~ the famous LET IT BE from Mother Mary~ I start to remember what I have already learned: that nothing has truly changed; that, regardless of my momentary emotions and perceptions, Truth can never change or be altered; therefore, my true self can never change or be altered. My spiritual practice does not need to render immediate, visible and perceivable results to be effective. God has nothing to prove, I have nothing to prove. 

As I am writing these declarations, I am again comforted and strengthened. Again, I feel like taking off to my place of communion with Father-Mother God, where I am so inaccessible to all the fuzz and frenzy of humanity.  I start to remember what It is all about and what It is not.  My physicality is but a veil behind which lies the eternal beauty of my only true altar.   We tear the veil of physicality time and time again, to uncover the Light that shines uninterruptedly.  The joy and peace that overtakes me seem so miraculous. I am reminded that all it takes is a single touch of Grace, teamed up with my willingness to stop trying and let go.  Thank You, God.

Romans 9:16
So then [God’s gift] is not a question of human will and human effort, but of God’s mercy. [It depends not on one’s own willingness nor on his strenuous exertion as in running a race, but on God’s having mercy on him.]